# Hamming questions v080925
Use this when the group explicitly opts into deeper, edgier exploration. Timebox and protect the container.
Protocol
- consent first: red/yellow/green, opt-out anytime, no pressuring
- cadence: 90s pause to jot, 5–7m share, 3m follow-ups, 5% reveal each round
- confidentiality: no screenshots, no retelling without permission
## calibration
- what topic feels charged but alive for you right now? why?
![[ed67e5a3-9767-40d4-8afa-2d19cc54a358.wav]]
- what question are you afraid I’ll ask because you might answer honestly?
- what boundary do you want me to honor tonight?
## shadow & desire
- what do you want that you’re embarrassed to want?
![[ad05b4a6-b12e-48cd-80a3-3817724f6d70.wav]]
- where does your desire predictably sabotage your long-term goals?
- when do you choose intensity over intimacy?
- what’s the kindest way you’ve ever handled a dark impulse?
- what are you optimizing for in sex/romance that your friends wouldn’t guess?
- what unspoken rule from childhood still controls your relationships?
## status, money, power
- what status game are you playing that you pretend you’re not?
- which dollar amount would measurably change your self-respect, and why?
- where have you used power well? where did you misuse it?
- what job/title would you never take because it would change who you are?
- when do you trade truth for belonging?
## truth, integrity, betrayal
- when did you last keep a truth private because the relationship mattered more?
- what belief of yours would you risk a friendship to defend?
- what’s a time you betrayed your own standard? how would you repair it now?
- where is your public persona out of sync with how you live?
- if a camera followed you for a week, what edit would you beg for?
## attachment, sex, boundaries
- what pattern do you bring to conflict (protest/withdraw/fawn)? how do you repair?
- what’s a boundary you set too late? what would “early” have looked like?
- what’s a desire you’ve never said out loud but want to be known for?
- what makes you feel safest during rupture and repair?
- what’s a loving “no” you need to say this month?
## risk, nonlinearity, edge
- what is your most asymmetric bet available this quarter?
- which fear would unlock a power-up if you trained it deliberately for 30 days?
- what would you attempt if there were zero reputational consequences?
- what constraint do you refuse on principle?
- where are you playing not to lose?
## death, regret, meaning
- if nothing changed for 3 years, what regret would harden?
- what would your older self beg you to start this month?
- what ritual reliably makes you kinder or more truthful?
- if you could delete one recurring thought from your inner world, which?
## meta & commitments
- what experiment will you run this week because of tonight’s conversation?
- what truth do you want me to mirror back to you next time if you drift?
- what question should I have asked you?
tags: #human-prompt #prompts #social-game #bigtalk